*content warning* please be advised this article contains discussion of trauma, dissociation, triggers, flashbacks and recommendation of deep internal work that may bring up some buried emotions and memories. please read at your own discretion.

trauma can sometimes lead to dissociation, a coping mechanism where we feel detached from reality or our own bodies.

while it can provide us with temporary relief, we must learn ways to manage it, as it may interfere with our wellbeing and daily life.

this article explores common symptoms of dissociation and offers strategies to help manage it through personal experience.

remember, you are not alone. many people experience dissociation after trauma – support is available to help you regain control and heal.

what is dissociation and why does it happen?

one of the main responsibilities our body’s have, is to protect us, and it will try its harder to keep us from feeling immense pain and distress.

one way our body does this is by creating a coping mechanism, dissociation, without our awareness.

when we dissociate, it’s our brains way of attempting to give us a rest.

a rest from stress, overwhelming or overpowering emotions, memories of a traumatic experience, harmful thoughts, ect.

this defence mechanism essentially creates a short term mental escape for us, by disconnecting us from our emotions, thoughts, perceptions, ect.

the effects trauma can have on dissociation

it is very common for people who have trauma to also experience dissociation.

trauma can cause a variety of powerful, sometimes overpowering, emotional sensations and physical reactions.

everyone reacts to trauma differently as we are all unique and have different experiences.

sometimes we can struggle to cope with, or fully process the effects trauma causes us.

so that’s when our mind attempts to separate us from the intense pain and distress the traumatic event/s caused.

this can result in having memory gaps from the trauma, feeling numb and distant, or feeling as though we are detached from our body.

dissociation symptoms

signs and symptoms of dissociation after trauma vary from person to person, but it generally involves some sense of disconnection.

disconnection from the self, others, or the world around us and our reality.

1. losing track of time (having no recollection of what you’ve been doing)
2. feeling disconnected from your body
3. zoning off during conversations
4. feeling like you’re living in a dream and nothing is real
5. being emotionally detached or distant
6. having no idea of how you got somewhere
7. having out of the blue and sudden shifts in mood
8. being outside your body or looking at yourself from a third point of view
9. feeling ‘spaced out’ or like you’re out of your control
10. disorientation / confusion

please remember that your body dissociates as a way to try to cope with trauma and/or immense stress.

if your dissociation is negatively impacting your wellbeing or every day life, i highly advise you to seek professional help from a trained mental health or health professional 

– a psychologist, psychiatrist, therapist or any trained professional of that sorts.

all of the information and strategies i am providing you with today is purely from personal experience.

i am not a professional and the contents in this article are solely for general and informational purposes, it should never constitute professional advice and should not be relied upon as such. 

seeing a trauma-informed professional can be a vital step towards healing on your journey.

strategies for managing dissociation

journaling or having a tracker

to properly manage our dissociation, we must be able to figure out what are triggers are and how our body communicates to us.

keeping a journal is a helpful tool in expressing thoughts, feelings and experiences.

it is also important in helping identify any triggers or figure out patterns.

take note of when you are triggered or catch yourself out when you’re dissociated, this way you can start noticing what your triggers are.

this requires deep internal work and some digging around from your past -getting help from a qualified professional may be useful in this step.

self reflection is also important as it allows you to develop coping mechanisms to help manage your dissociation.

building awareness

gaining awareness of you body is so crucial in helping manage dissociation and overall healing.

creating a relationship with yourself allows you to understand the way your body communicates to you through cues.

mental sensations / emotional reactions – emotional awareness

– reconnecting with and understanding all of your emotions, and focusing on your mental cues, (anxious, fear, confusion, ect)

body sensations / physical reactions – self awareness

– understanding your sensations and physical cues (increased heart rate? dry mouth? stomach drop? light headed?)

environment / surroundings – sensory awareness

– taking in your surroundings and the environment you are in, using your 5 senses (this is helpful to bring yourself back to present when dissociating)

what can you see? what can you touch and feel? can you smell anything? are their sounds to hear? anything you can taste?

affirmations or repeating a mantra

saying affirmations can be an extremely helpful way to regulate and bring yourself back to reality.

you can say it out loud, or you can repeat it in your head – find what ever helps calm you the most.

our inner monologue holds so much power within us, so use it to your advantage.

i personally used to repeat “i am safe. i am allowed to feel my emotions over and over in my head to regulate myself.

here are some affirmations for inspiration. whatever you decide to say, make sure it resonates with you and you believe what you say.

grounding techniques

explore techniques that ground you and bring you back into the present time, so you can engage in them at times of dissociation.

‘grounding’ is a self soothing technique that calms us, helps reorient us back to reality and keep us in the present.

what grounds one person may not work for you, so this technique requires trial and error, until you find what works for you.

some examples of grounding techniques include.

deep breathing techniques, muscle tension and relaxation, using 5 senses, visualisation, music, comfort object, ect.

i tried a lot of grounding techniques until i found what helps me the most, these include,

– diaphragmatic breathing (my personal favourite)

– body movement (i wiggle my toes if in public or with someone, or go for a nature walk if by myself)

– pressure points (i apply pressure in the palm of my hand from my thumb)

prioritising your wellbeing

our wellbeing is one of the most important aspects in human life, as it plays a crucial factor in our quality of life.

some include our state of mind (emotional, mental and intellectual), physical health, social life, spirituality, ect.

when i say spiritual wellbeing, i mean having a sense of purpose in life and being connected to the values, beliefs and attitudes you hold.

ways to engage in regular self care and prioritise our wellbeing can include,

– getting efficient sleep

– eating nutritious foods

– maintaining hydration

– engaging in physical activity

– having a meaning in life

– setting healthy boundaries

– engaging in activities YOU enjoy

– surrounding yourself around friends and family

– taking breaks when needed

– cultivating gratitude

– self reflection on emotions, feelings and thoughts.

opening up to others

having a trusted support system is so beneficial in life, especially during times of healing.

open communication and vulnerability is extremely important when talking to others about your needs, wants or struggles.

sometimes just having someone that listens to you, without them even speaking, can help alleviate the pain you have endured.

reach out to trusted family, friends, therapist, or support groups.

engage in the activities you love so you can connect and build new relationships with people who share the same interests.

creating a personal plan

a personal plan consists of trying out the strategies suggested today.

find out what works for you and what doesn’t – remove the things that don’t work and write down what does.

a personal plan creates a visualisation of how to manage and regulate yourself, and prevent episodes of dissociation.

on your plan consider writing,

– what your triggers are

– what your body cues are (both emotional and physical)

– how long your dissociation usually lasts

– what helps regulate and bring yourself back to reality

– your coping mechanisms (grounding techniques / practical strategies)

– anything else you think will be helpful to know or to have as a reminder

mindfulness practises

to be mindful is to be consciously aware and present within time, (the speed of life can make us just go through the motions without realising it)

through my experience i have learnt that mindfulness is about setting into a rhythm.

start with a few minutes a day and then gradually increase the time as you become more comfortable. 

i recommend choosing a place and a time of day that is the least busy, so you can create a consistent routine.

are you a morning person? or do you need to rush around to get ready for work in the morning?

are you a night time person? or are you exhausted by the time it’s night so you will forget to practise mindfulness?

some mindfulness techniques can include

sense and release muscle groups, connection to nature, mindful walks, journaling, meditation, gratitude, worksheets, ect.

practical strategies

practical strategies are just systems that you know work for you.

they are reliable, consistent, realistic and effective – they work for you.

a walk in nature, holding a familiar object, fidgeting with something (mine was my necklace or hair), having a scent to smell, a song or sound to listen to, receiving a tight hug, cold water on face, stress ball, body movement -wiggle toes, stretch, run, yoga, ect.

seek professional help

i highly advise you to seek professional help from a trained mental health or health professional 

– a psychologist, psychiatrist, therapist or any trained professional of that sorts.

all of the information and strategies i am providing you with today is purely from personal experience and it should never constitute professional advice and should not be relied upon as such. 

personal experience:

i remember the day my psychologist said “i think you dissociate” and got me to do a test.

my initial reaction was, um how dare you say i have that, what are you on about.

but after understanding what it was and processing it, a massive feeling of relief overcame my body

– i finally got an answer to the thing my body did that i couldn’t quite put my finger on.

i spent days of researching and diving in to anything i could find about dissociation.

everything from understanding what it is, what actually happens in the brain, other peoples experiences, to ways i can help heal and stop it.

my dissociation hasn’t completely stopped, as healing is a journey not a destination

– but instead of it happening multiple times a day or week, it only happens once or twice a year through my management and strategies.

everything i have talked about in this article is purely from my experience, i just want to share what i have learnt and the strategies that helped me,

in hopes something can resonate with you and help in some way on your personal healing journey.

always remember, you are amazing 🤍

-mao

don’t give trauma the power to control you, you deserve to live how you want. take control of your trauma.

-life advice from one survivor to another