the messy truth of healing poem – heart behind ‘self impact’

person walking on a path on a mountain with the sunset sky. poem title "the path to me" written in bold.
- mao

the path to me

a night that was normal to everyones eye,
that was the night i was meant to die.
but plans didn’t work, my best friend was there,
in the moment of time, both so unaware.

my innocence beaming, happy for connection.
the relationship finally going in the right direction.
the moment i leaned in, the storm swallowed me whole,
you stole everything from me – my identity and soul.

i felt confused, alone, and small,
like no one saw me break at all.
the world kept turning, yet i stood still,
my youth held hostage against my will.

escaping the pain, suppressing within,
uncomfortable, trapped inside my own skin.
a roaring storm behind a steady face,
my voice … vanished, without a trace.

escaping made the days go slow,
a deep knowing, this isn’t how i grow.
so i faced the truth i tried to hide,
and told myself i had to decide.

my past could trap me in old pain,
or, i could choose to break the chain.
i felt the power i held deep within,
it was time for my healing journey to begin.

with pen in hand, i found my way,
through tangled thoughts i had pushed away.
each page became a quiet ground,
where pieces of myself were gently found.

hours of learning to free my mind,
facing the pain i feared to find.
through deep reflection and diving within,
i started to belong inside my own skin.

self impact ‘ was made to be your guide,
to release the feelings you tried to hide.
a journal shaped with you in mind,
to heal, reflect, and learn to be kind.

be soft with your heart, though it’s aching and sore,
and let your thoughts breathe, don’t lock the door.
with kindness comes a brighter view,
finding your voice, your strength…

your path, to you.

– mao

15/07/2025

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don’t give trauma the power to control you, you deserve to live the life you choose. take control of your trauma.

-life advice from one survivor to another

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